


Anguish

by JiHan_Minsungie



Series: Why Can't Sam Ever Catch A Break? [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Anger, Angst, Attempted Suicide, Emotional Baggage, Emotional Hurt, Gen, Hurt Sam Winchester, Injured Sam Winchester, Physical Abuse, Protective Dean Winchester
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-28
Updated: 2019-03-28
Packaged: 2019-12-25 18:36:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,985
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18267104
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JiHan_Minsungie/pseuds/JiHan_Minsungie
Summary: The true reason behind Mary's betrayal is revealed, and Sam is faced with her harsh reality.





	Anguish

“...Sam gets better. Because if he doesn’t, when I find you, and I will find you, I will take you apart.”

  
Sam, once he heard the approaching thuds of Dean’s footsteps, scrambled away, flopping back into bed. He managed to get under the covers right before his brother came in, cursing under his breath. Scraping a chair against the floor, Dean pulled up right next to Sam’s bed. His fingers began to comb through Sam’s hair and Sam sighed, upset that he has caused another argument. Probably thinking that he woke Sam up, Dean froze, but continued once nothing else happened. Dean started to massage his scalp and Sam relaxed, the stress leaving his body.

  
_Sam, Mary, and Ketch were on their own for the hunt. Castiel needed assistance with Heavenly problems, much to the chagrin of Dean, who was in the mood the decapitate things. It was only after Sam promised to call him after everything was done that Dean agreed to go with Castiel, because after all, Dean wouldn’t be Dean if he wasn’t worried about Sam. Castiel dragged his reluctant brother away, and Sam grimaced on the inside. He won’t have anybody that he trusts to help him if things turn awry. It was just after dusk when they arrived, the darkness seeping into the woods. It was the perfect time for the vampires to leave their nest, the best opportunity to prey onto their victims without getting caught. The area was fairly large, and with only three hunters on the premise, finding the nest before any vampires spotted them would be next to impossible. Him and his brother has dealt with worse. He’ll be fine. Sam glanced around and headed for the left, briskly walking away. Before he went deeper into the woods, however, a hand gripped his arm and he tensed, bracing for the impact. When nothing but snickering greeted him, Sam scowled and ripped his arm out of Ketch’s clutches._

  
_“Why are you following me, Ketch?,” Sam asked quietly, in case he alerted several vampires that they were on their way._

  
_“Mary insisted I join you, lest you get captured and I have to save your sorry ass. She also wants us to bond,” Ketch harshly whispered back, aware of Sam’s ire. “Continue, Samuel, we do not have all night.” Sam rolled his eyes but carried on, desperately hoping that this hunt would be over soon. Further and further they explored the depths, having no idea about the nest’s specific location. Sam slipped on a rock and fell on the ground. When he brought himself back onto his feet, he realized that his palms were cold and slick with something. Ketch, with some prompting, shone his flashlight and there it was. Blood. It couldn’t have occurred not too long ago if the blood hasn’t dried up yet. He darted off and Ketch struggles to catch up, cursing his long legs. A beaten down shed sits in the middle of nothing, the trees suspiciously absent. Dirt, moss, small carcasses, and spiderwebs surrounded the place. And having used a flashlight, Sam saw that a bloody trail led up to the door, where wooden planks were nailed against it. Ketch circled the back, wondering if there was another possible entrance. A loud piercing scream pierced his ears and Sam kicked the door with increasing force as it gave in, some splinters scraping against his skin. Frantically, Sam searched every room before he found a closed door with blood smeared around the knob, and he opened it, cautiously heading towards the basement, gun in hand._

  
_There were hooks attached to the ceiling. Ropes, secured from them, held the woman’s wrists together in intricate knots. Whimpering, she peeks up at Sam and once she realized that he wasn’t going to hurt her, she moves in earnest, doing her best to release herself from the knots, to no avail. Sam pulled out a butterfly knife and got to work, hoping to get her down before they return. Once she was free, she ran for the exit, but before Sam knew it, the woman was on the ground, scooting towards the corner. The vampire rapidly approached and took a hold of his neck, squeezing. Sam’s hands smacked the vampire’s arms, trying to irritate it enough to let him go. It only made it angrier and it threw Sam across the room. Sam groaned and tackled the monster, giving the woman a chance to escape. Sam smirked when he saw that the prisoner got out safely, which infuriated the vampire. An uppercut sent him sprawling to the floor. A foot stomped on his chest and the more he moved, the harder it was to breathe._ _In the next moment, the vampire’s body fell on top of Sam, it’s head rolling to the side. Flecks of blood got into his eyes and mouth. Sam frowns and pushes the vampire off, annoyed that Ketch had to save him. “Thanks, Ketch. I really appreciate it, man.”_

  
_Ketch sneered in response and ran off, this time leaving Sam behind. Sam was confused. Where was Ketch going? It soon became clear. The woman that escaped was in Ketch’s grip, crying for anyone to help her. Narrowing his eyes, Sam charged, furious that Ketch would use his British Men of Letters training on a human. Ketch barely budged, but it was just enough for the grip to loosen. She took her chance and elbowed Ketch in his solar plexus, never looking back. Sam tripped Ketch to prevent him from going after her, throwing punch after punch to keep him down, his rage getting the best of him._

  
_“Sam! What are you doing? Get off! Stop!,” Sam heard Mary screech, but he ignored it, continuing to release his frustrations. Mary threw a sharp punch towards his temple. Disoriented, Sam slumped over, Ketch limping away. His eyes going in and out of focus, Sam shakily stood up, not wanting Ketch to touch his mother. Mary made sure that Ketch was quite a distance away before facing Sam, her eyes darkening. Taking advantage of his state, Mary kneed him and flipped h_ im, _sending him flying into a large tree, the bark digging into his back and shoulder. Sam laid on the ground, not comfortable with hurting Mary, but when she kept on approaching, he panicked, slowly inching away._

_“Please, Mom, don’t,” Sam pleaded. “I’ll leave Ketch alone. I’ll never bother you again. But I’m your son. Doesn’t that mean anything? What happened to family?”_

_Mary glanced back to Ketch then stared at Sam, her eyes dimming. “Sam, I don’t see you as family. When you were a baby, yes, I loved you. But now? After I’ve heard about all the things you’ve done? Useless and problematic, that’s what you are to me.” And with that, she stomped on his wrist._

  
_His yell echoed throughout the woods and Mary hissed in warning, but it hurt too much for Sam to stay quiet. She aimed kick after kick at his stomach and he feebly curled up to prevent as much damage as possible. It didn’t work. She had focused on his ribs instead. Time passed by painfully slow before Ketch alerted Mary that the Impala was rumbling in the distance, and she cursed, hastily driving away, abandoning Sam once again. A blurred outline of what seemed to be Dean gently picked him up before Sam fainted, succumbing to pain._

  
“...Sammy!” Dean worried voice roused Sam out of the memory and Sam shakily got up and went to the bathroom. His brother had all but offered to help him piss, and all Dean got for his effort was a door slammed in his indignant face. Sam peered into the mirror and shook his head, disgusted at his appearance. His dark brown hair, greasy from being bedridden, was shaggier than usual, the curls resting on his nape. His eyes were more of a dark hazel today, tears stubbornly clinging to his eyelashes. After splashing his face, he walked out, attempting to smile. From the way Dean arched his eyebrow, Sam fell short.

  
He noticed the way Dean was dragging his feet, yawning every other second, in order to keep an eye on Sam. Sam headed towards the opposite end of the hall, and sat down on Dean’s bed, patting the space next to him. Dean jumped on the bed and laid his head against Sam’s legs, gazing up at Sam. Ignoring the penetrating look, Sam looked at Dean’s desk, his eyes narrowing on the picture. Mary looked so happy. Dean, beaming at the camera, was maybe three or four. Mary’s arms were resting against Dean’s shoulders, holding him in a loose embrace. Soft snores filled the room and Sam smiled sadly, carefully placing Dean’s head on the pillow before leaving, wanting Dean to get the sleep he desperately needed. Sam roamed around, settling on the library to ease his nerves. Picking up his dad’s journal, Sam flipped through the pages, getting lost in the little personal tidbits John added in the margins. He was reading the section dedicated to Djinns when he saw movement out of the corner of his eye. Hands snatched the journal and tossed it across the room, and Sam could only watch as it toppled over a lamp. Sharp nails dug into his cheeks once Mary forced him to pay attention to her. He waited for her to speak, knowing that any input from him would irritate her even more.

  
“Why is your brother threatening me, Sam? What did you tell him about that particular night?,” Mary gritted out, crossing her arms across her chest. Sam’s blood, glinting under the light, painted the tips of her nails.

  
“I’ve only been two places since our hunt: here and the hospital. When would I have even found time for that? I’ve been in and out of sleep ever since I got back. Trust me, if I told Dean, I would make sure everything was revealed. And if I did that, you and Ketch wouldn’t be alive right now,” Sam pointed out, rolling his eyes.

  
Mary scoffed, not believing a word. “I am his mother. He would never harm me.”

  
“I’m not trying to be arrogant, I’m really not, but Dean’s life revolves around me. Ever since he carried me out of that fire, he has been my protector.”

  
“All you’ve ever done was cause him problems. You were addicted to demon blood. You freed Lucifer from the cage. You lost your soul and murdered who knows how many people. You never searched for him while he was in Purgatory. Why does he stick by your side when there’s nothing to love about you, Sam?” Mary let her thoughts sink in before exiting the bunker, sarcastically waving.

  
Each word pierced Sam like a bullet, hitting the root of his insecurities. Mary was right. Dean would be better without him. He should’ve never came back, just like his father yelled at him all those years ago. Sam has caused nearly every bad thing to happen in their lives. If only Sam was never born, or died in that fire. Disappointed with himself for hurting Dean, once again, he ran into his room and locked it, searching the drawers for his prescription. The cap was hard to twist off because of his trembling fingers. It wouldn’t be the first time, not by a long shot, but maybe he’ll stay dead. Tilting his head back, Sam dumped the remaining pills in his mouth. He managed to swallow half of them by ignoring his gag reflex, a painful sensation going down. Dean kicked down the door, rushing over and knocking the bottle out of Sam’s hand.

  
“Sammy! Listen to me. You’re going to be okay. You have to be okay. Why would you do this?,” Dean whispered, patting Sam’s face to keep him awake. “Cas? I need you! Sam’s in trouble! Cas!”

**Author's Note:**

> Sam's my favorite, I promise.


End file.
